


(almost) let you break my heart

by mkhhhx



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Begging, Crying, Degradation, Dom/sub Undertones, Emotional Constipation, Knotting, M/M, Mating Bites, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Renjun is a little mean here, Rutting, Smut, as you can guess because of repressed feelings, implied nomin, mentioned renmin, mostly smut but there's some plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:47:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27545590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mkhhhx/pseuds/mkhhhx
Summary: “It hurts,” is all Donghyuck says,whimpers, in a way that is so uncharacteristic for alphas, but not quite for Donghyuck. Donghyuck didn’t really fill the stereotypical alpha bingo sheet very successfully, not with his high smooth voice and his docile playful nature. Especially not when he’s curled into himself, trembling on Renjun’s floor.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan
Comments: 28
Kudos: 302





	(almost) let you break my heart

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, welcome to one more a/b/o fic from my ever-expanding 'big dumb soft alpha donghyuck' agenda, hope you enjoy your stay :D 
> 
> This work is a cojoined effort of mine and [lua's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/laehys) last hardworking braincells after we realised that fics focusing on ruts instead of heats are relatively rare to find and well, if you can't read it you have to write it and then read it, right? [Here's](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27541897) a nahyuck born from the same idea!
> 
> As usual the biggest thank you to [mashie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeekiies) whose betaing once again saved me from uploading a mess of typos
> 
> See you at the end, enjoy!

Renjun could have easily missed it if he was listening to music or taking a shower, or even if he was just not paying attention, engrossed in his studying; the three rhythmic raps on their apartment door followed by another stray one, that is.

Jeno and Jaemin, sitting on their ratty couch freeze, staring at each other and then back at Renjun. The positive aspect of his roommates not only hearing the knock, but also recognising it as the specific knock of a specific someone outside their door is that Renjun isn’t imagining things, slowly losing his mind a week before finals. The negative aspect of the whole ordeal is exactly that: he is not imagining it. At the same time he hasn’t heard that knock for so long, not ever since their break up.

A few breaths pass, the air in the apartment completely still and of course, Jeno and Jaemin are waiting for him to decide and to make a move. Renjun, still in some kind of momentary daze walks the few steps from the kitchen to the door, half expecting to be met with nothing at the other side, laugh it off as something weird and resume making his half-assed dinner. 

It might not be his lucky day though. When he opens up Lee Donghyuck is on his doorstep, clad in an oversized coat, cheeks a sickly rose and his hands, awkwardly holding onto nothing in front of his body, are trembling.

Renjun can feel Jeno’s and Jaemin’s gazes on his back; but he can handle this himself just fine. He straightens up trying to match up Donghyuck’s height which is not that difficult, not with the way Donghyuck is slouching even more than he usually did, almost doubling into himself. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Renjun mutters between gritted teeth. Donghyuck looks somewhat unsteady on his feet. “Are you drunk?” He hopes that’s not the case because he isn’t up for pitying his ex, but also being drunk at seven pm on a Thursday is pretty pitiful.

“Renjunnie,” Donghyuck says, _whines_ , and it’s only then that Renjun notices the smell that must be seeping into the apartment already. “Renjunnie,” Donghyuck repeats and he sounds so close to crying that Renjun almost panics.

“You stink,” Renjun notes with as much nonchalance as he can muster while trying to keep his own pheromones in check before they start reacting on their own. He can smell Jaemin acting up and Jeno’s distress but he tries to ignore them.

“My rut,” Donghyuck whispers, so low that it’s almost hard to hear. “It started yesterday and–,” he is full on trembling, one hand clutching his stomach and the other the doorframe. “It hurts, Renjun.” 

Renjun stares at him. At the melted snow on his hair and the collar of his shirt, at his pink converse and the thin fabric of his joggers. He realises Donghyuck just put whatever he could get his hands on on himself and ran to Renjun’s apartment like this.

“Why didn’t you get an omega to help you?” Renjun asks. Donghyuck’s ruts were pretty brief, usually lasting just one day every two months, but the pre-rut symptoms started a week before it hit and Donghyuck knew how to recognise them just fine. 

“Doesn’t work,” Donghyuck lifts a hand, as if he wants to touch Renjun but lets it fall back to his body. “I tried, doesn’t work, I–I can’t.”

“What the fuck do you mean you can’t?” Renjun is starting to get impatient. He was supposed to be finishing dinner and getting started on his paper, not dealing with the mess that is Donghyuck and especially not with the mess that is Donghyuck on his rut.

“Nobody else,” Donghyuck says and he really looks like he’s about to collapse. “I can’t, nobody else helps.”

Renjun could shut the door right on Donghyuck’s face and let him deal with whatever shit is going on but deep down he knows; if anything happens to Lee Donghyuck because of him shutting the door to his face Renjun will never forgive himself. With every passing second he can also feel his cold demeanor crumbling as his pheromones are – purely out of nature and habit – reacting to Donghyuck’s. 

He knows it’s not the correct choice and he’s about to dig his own grave, but he lifts a hand to Donghyuck’s collar and pulls at it nonetheless, with a “come the fuck inside” that sounds way less hostile than he intended, _almost_ concerned.

“He’s not staying in the living room,” Jaemin growls from the couch, his whole body tense. He isn’t usually so aggressive, especially not to Donghyuck that could overpower him easily, but he must be close to his own rut too. Jeno is curled at the other end of the couch, hugging his knees close to his chest, probably scared with another alpha in such close proximity when his own alpha is already irritable.

“I’ll keep him in my room,” Renjun tells them, fist still on Donghyuck's collar as he drags him to the end of the long corridor after making him take his shoes off, socks leaving damp prints on the floor tiles. 

“Thank you,” Donghyuck says right after Renjun shuts the door behind them, collapsing between the door and Renjun’s desk, back sliding down the wall until he’s on the floor. “Thank you for not kicking me out.”

“What the hell, Donghyuck?” Renjun eyes him. He always looked worn down, spending hours at the studio after his classes and then staying up for most of the night working, but he looks even worse under the yellow light of Renjun’s lamp. 

“It hurts,” is all Donghyuck says, _whimpers_ , in a way that is so uncharacteristic for alphas, but not quite for Donghyuck. Donghyuck didn’t really fill the stereotypical alpha bingo sheet very successfully, not with his high smooth voice and his docile playful nature. Especially not when he’s curled into himself, trembling on Renjun’s floor.

“Take your coat off,” Renjun commands, scared that Donghyuck will get sick on top of his rut and reach a whole new level of insufferable. “Your socks too before you freeze to death, you _idiot_.”

He watches as Donghyuck slips his coat off his shoulders and then tries to take his socks off too with slow, uncoordinated motions. 

“Please,” Donghyuck looks up at him, obviously hard in his loose joggers and sweaty under his thin tee. “Please, Renjun, please.” His eyes are glassy and his hands are looking for leverage, but Renjun takes a step back and there’s nothing to hold on. “Please, it hurts.”

“Please what?” Renjun says, although he – his omega instinct – knows the answer already. “Why are you here?”

“It hurts,” Donghyuck says again and Renjun feels his patience running thin. “I need you, please.” Donghyuck gets on his knees, looking like he’s trying to stand up but he ends up clutching his stomach again. “Please take care of me.”

“Get on the bed,” Renjun says, because a soft surface will at least soothe down Donghyuck’s whining. Donghyuck blinks up at him, unmoving, still on his knees with head hanging low. His little omega voice says something right then, something along the lines of how submissive the alpha in front of him is being. Something about how much trust it takes for Donghyuck to be so openly helpless in front of an omega. “Get on the bed, Donghyuck.”

“Can’t move,” Donghyuck cries out quietly. 

“Oh fuck,” Renjun exhales. “You’re unbelievable.” He gets close to Donghyuck, close enough to lock his hands under Donghyuck’s armpits and half-lift, half-drag him the couple meters to the bed, carelessly throwing him on the mattress face down. “Don’t move.”

He hears the small desperate noise Donghyuck makes when Renjun steps out of the room and he doesn’t tell him he’ll be back soon, going to the kitchen, thankful to find the living room void of his roommates as he retrieves one of the ice packs they keep for their heats and ruts. 

He leans against the counter for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. He thinks back on the last time he saw Donghyuck, when he came over to collect his scattered stuff after the break up. He wasn’t naive enough to think he’d never seen him again, but he wasn’t prepared for anything like this and despite their mess of a break up, Renjun knows he still cares about Donghyuck. About the Donghyuck that cared for him when he needed it in any kind of way. About the Donghyuck that was honest and open and trying his best to communicate even when they drove each other up the walls. He doesn’t know if it’s wrong or right, but he knows he owes Donghyuck to take care of him too, not so much for the sake of the old days, but more to give back what he took. Maybe when they are even, then they will truly be able to move on.

When he puts his cold, bitchy facade back on and opens the door to his room he finds Donghyuck with his face buried in Renjun’s pillows, hips stuttering just for a moment – when he hears the door – and then resuming the rutting down the sheets. Renjun knows that this kind of friction is less than barely enough for Donghyuck and he simply stands there, watching him, how he moves, how he mewls, how he noses on the pillows; getting off on Renjun’s scent.

“You’re pathetic,” Renjun stands next to the bed, leaving the water bottles he fetched on the bedside table. “Turn around.”

Donghyuck complies with a deep groan, turning onto his back, cheeks even more flush than before and his pants so badly stained with precome that they must be beyond saving. 

Donghyuck looks at Renjun first and then notices what he’s holding, making grabby hands for it. 

“It’s gonna hit me really badly soon,” Donghyuck lifts his shirt to place the ice pack directly on his stomach, very obviously trying really hard to not touch his crotch area. At least he sounds a little less shaken and Renjun doesn’t want to admit to himself what must have done the trick; his scent always calmed Donghyuck down right away.

“Why did you come to me?” Renjun asks, knowing that there’s no way out now, not until the rut is over, but he’s curious all the same. “You could find any omega, damn you could even spray one of your toys with omega pheromones and be done with it.”

“I told you,” Donghyuck's voice gets loud before it turns into a whisper again. “I tried to tell you, it doesn’t work, I can’t knot other people.”

“What do you mean you can’t–you can’t just not fucking be able to knot, what kind of alpha–” Renjun knows he sounds pissed, which isn’t remotely helpful when he’s aware that sooner or later Donghyuck’s knot will be inside him, but he isn’t about to give in that easily.

“I can’t knot other omegas, Renjun,” Donghyuck hastily takes his shirt off, exposing soft, smooth skin. But this isn’t what Donghyuck wants to show him. Renjun’s eyes trail up to his collarbones. Donghyuck still has a bite, a mating, possessive bite from one of their last nights together. It shouldn’t be there because Renjun’s bites disappeared months ago, but it is, red against tan skin. “I can’t knot other omegas because _you_ are my omega.”

“You _fucker_ ,” Renjun gets on the bed and throws a leg over Donghyuck’s lap straddling him, his instincts taking over before he can stop himself. “What the _fuck_ Donghyuck,” he puts his hands on Donghyuck’s shoulders and shakes him. “What the absolute fuck, we broke up half a year ago.”

“I couldn’t help it,” Donghyuck all but sobs, hips thrusting up, looking for some friction. “I tried Renjun, I really did, I tried making it go away.”

Renjun fumes. He doesn’t really know what for. For the ridiculousness of the situation. For Donghyuck so openly admitting he’s still in love with him. For Renjun knowing he’s not yet over Donghyuck and hating himself for it. For making Donghyuck cry, literally cry, underneath him.

“You didn’t try hard enough,” Renjun slaps him. Not hard enough to hurt, but enough to sting, sting in the way Donghyuck loves. “I hate you.” He feels the fight slowly leaving his body, his own underwear dampening with slick. He knows Donghyuck can smell it. He knows Donghyuck can feel it. 

“You can hate me all you want,” Donghyuck smiles between sobs. “I won’t love you any less.”

“The alpha next door can hear you fucking _cry_ , Donghyuck,” Renjun tries again, Donghyuck’s hands resting low on his sides and his cock slowly grinding, flush against his ass. “You’re a shitty excuse of an alpha.”

“I’m not an alpha,” Donghyuck growls, grabbing Renjun by the shirt and pulling him down, their faces inches apart. “I’m _your_ alpha.”

“Jaemin fucked me through my last heats,” Renjuns gets even closer, whispers right against Donghyuck’s lips. “Fucked me so well, face down, ass up, right on this very bed. So well I was begging him to breed me.” 

That would do the trick with any other alpha. Would drive them wild with rage. Would make their pheromones so thick it’d be hard to breathe. But not Donghyuck, not _his_ Donghyuck. 

Donghyuck’s chest stops rocking with sobs and Renjun can feel how feverish he’s getting, how much he’s consciously holding back. 

“Did he make you feel like I do?” Donghyuck smirks up at him and Renjun wants to slap it off of his face, make it really hurt this time. He hates how Donghyuck can read him like an open book even after so long. “Does he make you scream his name? Does he make you feel whole?”

“Shut up,” Renjun takes his own shirt off and then pulls Donghyuck’s joggers down along with his underwear, not all the way but just enough to make it work because he’s getting too impatient and can’t bother. “Your dumb rut is making you delirious.” He wants this to be over as soon as possible, he wants Donghyuck’s dumb dick to calm down, he wants Donghyuck out of the door. He doesn’t, not really, but he ignores that.

“Are you gonna ride me?” Donghyuck’s hands wander on Renjun’s body, precome and slick making everything so messy between them in a way that promises a good time. “I like that.”

“Since you can’t fucking keep yourself up to fuck me properly,” Renjun retorts and Donghyuck just pulls him down, his hand between them, rubbing Renjun’s slick on his hole in small circles. They’ve been together for two years after all; Donghyuck knows when to take the bait. He knows when to not too, for the sake of laying down and watching Renjun fuck himself on his cock. Deep down Renjun knows that the sense of control the position gives him is nothing compared to the pleasure Donghyuck draws from it.

Fucking comes as second nature to them. Renjun’s body guides him through every little thing purely based on muscle memory. The ice pack is discarded somewhere on the floor, Renjun’s hands taking its place as he props himself only to slam his hips back down, taking all of Donghyuck in before lifting himself again. They are erratic, all out of any sort of rhythm but it’s good; so good when Donghyuck starts slamming up into him desperately, his soft sounds turning gravelly, rough, so good with how wet Renjun has gotten, so _damn_ good when he starts feeling Donghyuck’s knot against his opening; a clear indication of how much Donghyuck wants him.

“You want to come, don’t you, baby?” Renjun pulls at Donghyuck’s hair, at the long, dirty blond strands. “Don’t you want to knot me?” 

“Fuck,” Donghyuck’s cock twitches still inside Renjun. “Fuck, please.”

“Do you deserve it?” Renjun stops moving, Donghyuck’s knot out of him and they both know that soon it’ll be too big to slip back inside. “Do you deserve knotting me after coming here just like that, begging me to help you?”

“I deserve it,” Donghyuck trashes beneath him. “I am your alpha.”

“Alphas don’t beg, Donghyuckie,” Renjun lowers himself, painfully slow, just to feel the full extent of Donghyuck’s knot stretching him open. He’s bigger than Jaemin. He’s so good. “Alphas don’t cry for their omegas.” 

“Holy fuck,” Donghyuck deflates back on the bed when his knot is seated deep inside Renjun and he can’t move anymore, coming in waves, filling Renjun like he hasn’t been filled in months, sating something in him. Donghyuck comes and comes like he hasn’t had a proper orgasm in too long and Renjun feels lightheaded, feels like Donghyuck deserves him to drop his facade, even if just for a moment.

He lowers himself, Donhyuck messily jerking him off between their bodies. He feels so close and he lets go, sputtering white on Donghyuck’s stomach, Donghyuck holding him steady through his orgasm before letting Renjun collapse on top of him.

He places a sloppy kiss on Donghyuck’s lips and pecks his cheekbones, trailing his tongue on the shell of his ear. “I don’t care about any of the shit you do or don’t do,” he purrs into Donghyuck’s ear. “You’re my alpha.”

He knows the bite mark he’s left on Donghyuck’s collarbone isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. He leaves a second one on the side of his neck though, just in case.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> You can find me [here](https://twitter.com/kuns_dimples)!


End file.
